Best 50+ Will Farell Quotes

Will Farell funny Quotes

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.

I’m in a glass case of emotion.

Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, you write on walls and you get poked by people you don’t know.

If no-one comes from the future to stop doing it, then how bad of a decision can it really be?

No matter how much you screw up your own life by the wrong decisions that you make, it’s never too late to do the right thing and change your ways and you can teach old dogs new tricks.

America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, badass speed.

Alcohol is like Photoshop for real life.

Grief is nature’s most powerful aphrodisiac.

Well, I could be wrong, but I believe diversity is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.

There’s a benefit to losing, you get to learn from your mistakes.

Immature is aword boring people use to describe fun people.

I’m just a big, hairy, American winning machine!

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!

I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.

Whenever someone calls me ugly I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

I’m a Progressive. Much in the same way our founding fathers – who, oddly enough, wouldn’t get elected today – were Progressives.

I put my pants on just like the rest of you – one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold records.

I’m a Cancer; I’m music passionate. I like long walks on the beach.

I’m a panicked karaoke participant because I am always searching for a song in the moment. I don’t have my go to song. I will be driving along and I will be like, “That should be my karaoke song!” and then I forget what song it is.

I’m a really good swimmer.

Why not work with your friends? It’s working with people you know, and you share the same sensibility.

Inappropriate behavior makes me laugh.

James Caan told me at the end of filming ‘Elf’ that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny – and I never was.

You know you can be having a bad day and someone will walk by and say: ‘Hey, I love you, Will.’ That really cheers you up. That’s a really lovely thing.

Everyone I know who skis is dead.

I Was so Drunk, I Thought a Tube of Toothpaste Was Astronaut Food.

In every circle of friends there’s always that one person everyone secretly hates. Don’t have one? Then it’s probably you.

I guess destiny is not the path given to us but the path we choose for ourselves.

I’ve never been a conceited person or cocky, never felt boastful, but I always had a sense of self-worth; I always had a real sense of myself.

Anyone can memorize facts and figures. The real way to learn anything is to go out and experience it. Let your curiosity lead you.

What about Santa’s cookies? I suppose ‘parents’ eat those, too?

You did it! Congratulations! World’s best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It’s great to be here.

I just Fell Down the Stairs Holding a Guitar and Accidentally Wrote a One Direction Song.

I look good. I mean, really good. Hey everyone! Come and see how good I look!

No matter how much you screw up your life, you can fix it.

There’s nothing sexy about Orange County.

I never put too much pressure on myself when I’m the central thing, just because I don’t think I could handle it mentally. I haven’t really thought about the implications of carrying a movie. It still has to be just a fun, weird thing.

Aren’t we all striving to be overpaid for what we do?

The funny guy doesn’t get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn’t have.

When you’re doing an out-and-out comedy, the notion of preparing for a character – I hope I don’t reveal too much of myself here – but, uh, no, I’m not doing anything.

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet.

A fashion plate, a rock star in his own mind, Megamind is more showman than deadly menace.

I’m a cotton-headed ninny muggins.

When you look at someone like Sacha Baron Cohen, you have to really respect the boundaries he is pushing as Bruno or Borat.

I’ve always wanted to sail around the world in a handmade boat, and I built a boat.

I still regret that I never played soccer in high school. I chose basketball over soccer.

I want to thank Jesus, and by Jesus I mean Jesus Hernandez, my bodyguard.

You have to listen a lot, and you have to be open and ready to adjust to anything. It kind of provides a framework that you use all the time. You never really shut off that part of your brain when you’re doing something. It’s invaluable to have.

Enjoy the little fun things – like taking your kids to school – before they’re all grown up.

Will Farell Quotes

“All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other people think that what you think is funny is funny. I don’t have an answer but I just try to plough straight ahead.” – Will Ferrell

“I have only been funny about seventy-four percent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-four percent of the time.” – Will Ferrell

“There’s always going to be someone as funny as you or funnier.” – Will Ferrell

“It’d be great to be in a position where you can make choices regardless of money. My tastes are always gonna lead me to go for the amazing project where I’m being paid in Turkish cantaloupes.” – Will Ferrell

“I would love to play Simon Cowell in a movie – heck, I would love it. It would be my dream role.” – Will Ferrell

“I think a lot of the instincts you have doing comedy are really the same for doing drama, in that it’s essentially about listening. The way I approach comedy, is you have to commit to everything as if it’s a dramatic role, meaning you play it straight.” – Will Ferrell

“Saturday Night Live is such a comedy boot camp in a way, because you get to work with so many different people who come in to host the show and you get thrown into so many situations and learn how to think on your feet, so filmmaking actually feels slow, in a good way.” – Will Ferrell

“I think anyone who has, you know, is in any sort of artistic pursuit, kind of goes up and down with the way they feel about their work. And I, for the most part, am a pretty happy person. But, yeah. I go through definite periods of time where I’m not funny. I’m not good. I’m – I don’t feel original.” – Will Ferrell

“I love playing the macho guy who looks like an idiot.” – Will Ferrell

“It’s very easy for me to play silly, but to reveal something closer to you, that’s so much harder.” – Will Ferrell

“I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the manchild, the adolescent, characters that refuse to grow up. And yet, if you look back in the history of comedy all the way back to the Marx brothers, that’s a big part of comedy.” – Will Ferrell

“I know the nature of comedy, and you never know what will happen with the next movie or whether people will find it funny.” – Will Ferrell

“Aren’t we all striving to be overpaid for what we do?” – Will Ferrell

“I’ve always had, when I needed it, an extreme amount of focus that I could put into something. That has served me well.” – Will Ferrell

“You still have that competitive thing where you want to try to make hits. That won’t go away, unless the mayor of show business says my time’s up.” – Will Ferrell

“Anyone who does anything creative is always gonna want to change.” – Will Ferrell

“I guess ultimately a lot of comedians just wanna be taken seriously.” – Will Ferrell

“Here’s the deal I’m the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.” – Will Ferrell, “Talladega Nights”

“No, you go to hell, and while you’re there, why don’t you grab me a juice box! – Will Ferrell, “Kicking and Screaming”

“It’s so damn hot… milk was a bad choice.” – Will Ferrell, “Anchorman”

“Help me Jesus! Help me Jewish God! Help me Allah! Help me Tom Cruise! Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me!” – Will Ferrell, “Talladega Nights”

“We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”

“I swear, I’m so pissed off at my mom. As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.” – Will Ferrell, “Step Brothers”

“Matt Lauer can suck it!” – Will Ferrell, “Land of the Lost”

“I passed through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gumdrops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”

“How ’bout we go get kicked out of an Applebee’s?” – Will Ferrell, “Talladega Nights”

“Don’t act like you’re not impressed.” – Will Ferrell, “Anchorman”

“One day I’ll get you over that wall of anger, and it will be glorious!” – Will Ferrell, “The Other Guys”

“I’ve never been a conceited person or cocky, never felt boastful, but I always had a sense of self-worth; I always had a real sense of myself.” – Will Ferrell

“I’m a Cancer; I’m music-passionate. I like long walks on the beach.” – Will Ferrell

“I’m a selective packrat. There’s some things I have no problem getting rid of and others I hold onto dearly.” – Will Ferrell

“I’m a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking – mostly Thai food.” – Will Ferrell

“Enjoy the little fun things – like taking your kids to school – before they’re all grown up.” – Will Ferrell

“I’ve always wanted to sail around the world in a handmade boat, and I built a boat.” – Will Ferrell

“I hate when someone drives my car and resets all the radio presets. I don’t understand it. If I was ever driving someone’s car, I would never touch the things that were set.” – Will Ferrell

“I left home to go to college, and then I moved back home. I moved back for three years from 21 to 24.” – Will Ferrell

“I speak as much Spanish as anyone who has grown up in Southern California or Texas or Arizona. I had my three years of high-school Spanish and a couple of semesters in college.” – Will Ferrell

“When I was ten, I wrote an essay on what I would be when I grew up and said I would be a professional soccer player and a comedian in offseason.” – Will Ferrell

“I still regret that I never played soccer in high school. I chose basketball over soccer.” – Will Ferrell

“I remember going with my mom to a random garage sale as a kid and thinking what a cool treasure hunt that whole world was. Only to transition as an adult to think, ‘What a gross place that really is.’” – Will Ferrell

“One of my first memories of being a kid was, ‘I want to have a real job when I grow up.’ And to me that meant you wear a suit and a hat and carry a briefcase and go to your job.” – Will Ferrell

“I grew up in an entertainment family, and so I saw how susceptible you are to the ups and downs of this business.” – Will Ferrell

“I always just forced myself to do crazy things in public. In college I would push an overhead projector across campus with my pants just low enough to show my butt. Then my friend would incite the crowd to be like, ‘Look at that idiot!’ That’s how I got over being shy.” – Will Ferrell

“My dad turned me onto Peter Sellers as a kid. I loved the fact that he was a unique combination of being extremely subtle and over-the-top all at the same time, and that’s a hard thing to do. I admire that.” – Will Ferrell

“In the fourth grade, I learned how to fake walking into a door. You know, you hit it with your hand and snap your head back. The girls loved it.” – Will Ferrell

“By the time I was ready for college, I didn’t know what I wanted to do. I think I secretly wanted a show business career, but I was suppressing it.” – Will Ferrell

“I’ve always loved watching the news on TV. As a kid, I loved watching Walter Cronkite, for some reason.” – Will Ferrell

“In junior high P.E., I was way too shy to take a shower in front of the other kids. It was a horribly awkward time – body hair, odors… So I’d go from my sweaty shirt back into my regular clothes and have to continue the day.” – Will Ferrell

“I did plenty of jobs that I hated. I was a bank teller and terrible at it. I parked cars, a valet. I answered phones. I somehow avoided being a waiter. I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep the order straight. I’m not much of a multi-tasker.” – Will Ferrell

“I was a strange kid in that, while most kids hate school and want to turn 18 or 21, I loved high school.” – Will Ferrell

“Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell

“Oftentimes I’m confronted with a quote that I don’t remember saying. So, on one hand, it’s very flattering, it is just so surreal.” – Will Ferrell